hmm havent blogged in a while
tt's qt unlike me who at least blogs once a week
so ya this is act considered qt long...
haha
wad haf i been doing?
nth much in fact
gg to work everyday
giving tuition every alternate days

work's fine
not getting scolded so often now
altho at times i still get the look tt says "what? u dunno this??"
n i know tt sometimes i do things qt slowly...
but at least i get more encouraging comments frm my mentor cum manager
so tt i dun feel so stupid...
but sometimes hw i wished they would tell me wad they want directly instead of making me guess den after i finish doing i still have to keep changing my original stuff
it gets abit annoying esp if u haf alr printed it out...
i hate adjusting the page breaks for excel
haha
n i need to get some reading done...
but the company act n company winding up rules are really a bit boring to read....
yawnz...
anw i was rather surprised tt my co has actually handled qt a few landmark cases
like the roberto building material n pan el case...
ok nt like those of u reading will noe...
hahaha
anw all these cases were landmark cases which I kept seeing during my biz law modules...

tuition's fine
but i'm contemplating whether i should switch to teaching private instead
at least it's more flexible n i can get more...
n it's less tiring...
act i've grown qt attached to those kids of mine
their comments can juz make u luff even when u r trying to be angry lor
hahaha
the qn is why am i giving tuition when i alr found a job?
the ans is coz i need money
hahaha
i was working out my finances based on my current salary n i realised tt it's a bit tight
coz i guess i will continue to gif tuition for a while more ba
anyone gt lobang??
sec 1 n sec 2 maths, or pri english anyone?
$40/hr

at home...
let's put it this way
i've decided to take the route of disengagement
when u find tt u can't do anything ant the stressor this is one way of dealing with tt stressor
i think i've tried my best for the past few mths
seeing her doc trying to find a solution
trying to convince her to see the doc
trying to convince her to eat her medicine
brought her to the hospital (tt's a whole new diiferent story... which some may haf heard some may not)
kept her company as much as possible...
i really tried...
first i had to deal with uncooperative family members who were living in their world hoping tt things will juz go away
or waiting for someone to deal with the problem
now...
i juz gif up...
1 yr ago
i cried n cried when she said all those hurtful things
i was super upset
up till a few mths ago i was still crying
now i still cry
but lesser
i'm crying even as i'm typing this part..
now i choose to walk away when she starts saying all those things again
i know tt she cant help wad she's doing
but i really cannot stand it anymore
i really noe wad's the meaning of 心冷/心凉了。
it has come to a point tt i dun really care wad she do now...
sometimes i juz feel like going away to hide in a shell n wake up to see tt everything is fine
well.. to quote dear...
life is never easy..
it has never been..
and will never be...
i added the last 2 sentences
hahahaha
the only thing i can hope for is tt these trials will make me into a stronger n better person...
n to look on the bright side
my life is really nt tt bad
i have supportive frenz, an understanding bf and at least i dun haf to worry abt my next meal...
it's true..
u see the sufferings of others n u find tt ur problems r really nth as compared to theirs...

Children in Crisis - The Facts
The Asia-Pacific region is home to around half the world's children.
40% of them live in poverty.
Around 127 million of them are working. (International Labour Organisation)
Tens of millions of them live homeless on the streets. (UNICEF)
An estimated 1.2 million children are being trafficked every year because there is a demand for trafficked children as cheap labour or for sexual exploitation. (UNICEF)
An estimated 158 million children aged 5-14 are engaged in child labour, working in mines, working with chemicals and pesticides in agriculture or working with dangerous machinery. (UNICEF)

...........................................................

Sophea* was one of the thousands but youngest victim of the rampant child sex trafficking in her country.

Sophea was only 11 when she left her home in Cambodia to work as a domestic helper in Bangkok. Her father abandoned her when she was very young and since then, life became a daily struggle for this child who had to feed and keep herself alive.

Lured by a bogus job offer which promised to pay some S$130 a month, Sophea was duped by her trusted boyfriend’s mother and delivered into the hands of brothel owners near the Thai border where life became a living hell.

“Life there was unbearable,” cried Sophea. “The men liked girls and I was the youngest. I had all sorts of customers, Thai and Cambodian. Worst were the beatings if I said no. They gave me drugs and told me afterwards that I would need to pay for them out of my salary. I was never given any money at all for what I was doing, only more drugs.”

Each day, she waited for someone to come to her rescue but the waiting soon turned from days to months and a year. Sophea is not alone in this grim world because there are thousands of girls worldwide who go through similar ordeals and times when the waiting comes to a naught.
Today, Cambodia is among 20 of the world’s poorest countries. The majority of its 13 million people live on less than a dollar a day. Half its children have never been immunised against debilitating diseases like polio and tuberculosis. Profound poverty forces families into life on the streets.

-frm http://www.worldvision.org.sg/st_news_rm_article.php?article=154#link154

i could haf been born to a family like Sophea's
but i wasn't
it's all these little things tt makes us feel blessed n is worth feeling thankful abt..

u noe wad??
my auntie act has an extra tix to F1 today!
n i din go.....
i was act qt tempted....
but today nobody's at home except for my mum...
so here i am...
haix
nvm i can watch it on tv...
ya la..wad's so exciting abt sitting there for a long time den finally when the car comes u only see a flash of colour n hear a loud n deafening sound...
but F1 fever seemed to haf spread to many pple
n has sort of made me curious to want to see wad all this is abt
haha

it's all coming back again...
oh my god!!
this is really frustrating
this is like a problem wif no end in sight
having family members who deal wif stress thru behavioural disengagement sux in situations like this...this includes me...
hoping that things will get better
hoping tt the problem will go away by itself juz ain't gg to work
i hope n hope for so loong but the problem is still there
haix

getting pms when u first start work sux too
getting pms means i get v emotional
depending on the situation it can either be bouts when i feel like crying all the time
or i can feel pissed off at the littlest things (this one i think maureen has been on the receiving end for the past 2 mths altho it wasn't targetted at her..poor ger...haha..sorry ger..)
this week was the feel-like-crying bout..
not for no reason of coz
if this occurred on a normal day i wouldn't even feel like crying
when i first started work
the boss n his wife warned us tt as newcomers we will get frustrated a lot of times coz we dunno how things r done
but from how i see it
a lot of this frustration can be reduced simply by improving their training method
or maybe it's juz HER teaching
makes one really pissed off...
of coz i can understand n accept that some pple r juz quick tempered n their tempers come n go n r actually qt harmless
but sometimes things tt r obvious to u as a senior staff r not obvious to us as a junior staff who only joined 2 weeks ago
it's juz like how 3x4=12 is like der... to us adults
u to a 7 yr old kid who has difficulty with 3+4=7, 3x4=12 is not obvious at all...
u dun haf to tok to me like i'm stupid or wad...
i nv thot tt i was v smart
neither do i think tt i'm stupid..
constructive criticisms r also always welcomed but not UNconstructive ones
frustration at not being able to pick up the job is one thing
it's aimed at oneself n may make the person work harder n learn more
frustration at not being tauught properly is another thing
it's out of my control....
ya la..to look at it more positively, this is really a test of my EQ n adaptability n my initiativeness in asking for help to get things done
i can't wait for my manager to come back from leave
his impatience i can take
his moodiness somtimes i can take
at least when he makes comments it's usu constructive...
n he's more willing to teach me
tt's prob coz it's his responsibiltiy to teach me
wahahaha
but tt's better than feeling like a pest/additional work to some other pple who has no choice but to teach me

on a happier note
my auntie's website is finally up
she sells art pieces/sculptures/table displays
some of them i think r really nice n unique...
they make qt good gifts for people too...
do go visit her webbie at www.sui-art.com

first week of work...
not too bad...

monday
went into the office, listen to boss tok a little..den look thru 1 of the case files for the background info den went to do fieldwork...meaning i was out of office after lunch...
shiok..
haha
the place where i went to was at woodlands link which is really near my hse n lamu abigail abimu's hse...
super happy
i took like 20 mins to rch home
wahahaha
btw, boss lady has an ultra good complexion
she's at least 50+ 60 yrs old but she has very very little wrinkles
AND her face is like super smooth n it GLOWS....
tok abt aging gracefully
haha
i wan to be like her at tt age minus all the long-windedness

tuesday
din have to go to office
juz went str to woodlands link n my manager volunteered to pick me up coz i had no idea hw to get there..
shiok
dun haf to wake up so early..
den after work he sent me back to my hse
but unfortunately
i had tuition so i had to go for tuition
my hse seemed so near yet so far then...
haha
n i received an sms tt made me want chui2 xin1 gan1
nvm i believe things happen for a reason...
if i'm really fated for this job i believe i will be in tt job ultimately..
having juz started work i'm not prepared to risk my reputation b4 i even start building it
esp nt in a profession tt i'm very keen on building my career in..

wednesday
sian had to go back to the office
haha
so had to do work in the office
basically the rest of the week was spent in the office doing tabulations
some tabulations r really disgusting
esp when u get numbers tt dun tally
haha

hmmm for this job..the training qt different frm the previous jobs tt i've done
there's little formal training per se
it's more of on the job training
like throwing u into the deep blue sea first
n if u cant swim just shout for help
whereas in the previous jobs
they usu teach u how to swim first den throw u into the water
i guess both methods haf their pros n cons
for the 1st method
it can be qt frustrating at times coz sometimes u really dunno hw to do a lot of things
oh wells...
there r many things to learn
n like wad they say insolvency invlolves a lifetime of learning
speaking of which i'm supposed or rather my manager recommend tt we get familiarised with the co's act n frs which i havent even looked peeped at...
haha

now let's tok abt food...
hahaha
my office is like directly opp golden shoe
how much better can it get..
hahaha
this is prob the 1st time i went back to golden shoe after they renovated it
av prices r up..
but ok la
food is still not too bad...
at least the nasi lemak nv inc their prices
hahaha
now also got more variety
last time mei xin was like only a small coffee shop
now it has bcum a food court...
sell more stuff
maybe when i get sick of golden shoe i can try to find my way to amoy st hawker ctr
heard they gt nice n cheap food there too..
haha

have i said b4
I LOVE WORKING IN RAFFLES PLACE
1. great food
2. can get seats on the way home if u r fast enuff
3.the name raffles place speaks for itself
working in an office in raffles place alr sounds cooler than working in an office elsewhere
haha

i guess i'm still adjusting to working life
esp this working environment seems qt foreign to me..
coz it's unlike the previous ones where pple were all so friendly n chatty
not to say tt they r not friendly now
juz tt it's a bit hard to be chatty when the boss's office is juz right in front o u n the manager's office is juz right next to u..
hahahaha
i'm tired everyday tt i cum home
but i think it's juz my body making adjustments
it's more of the waking up early tt makes me tired
the workload is still qt alright
afterall i'm nocturnal rmbr..
hahahaha

btw kway chap yesterday was fantastic
haha
too bad the rest couldnt make it..
hahaha
n yesterday i forgot to wish ek
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

will be starting work in less than 9hrs
my first full time job
previously all the jobs that i've done whether contract or temp or PA
i alw know when it ends
now it's a bit different
coz it's the first step of my career
my future could be spent doing this
or i could totally be disgusted with it and go find something else
i dunno
the only thing tt remains the same is the jittery feeling tt i get b4 the 1st day of work
this jittery feeling has been kept at bay these few days...
even a few hrs ago...
hope it continues to be kept at bay
coz if not i can guarantee plus chop that i won't be sleeping tonite
all the promises to myself that i'll adjust my body clock has not been delivered
n nervousness does not help
wahahaha
i dunno y but i'm so afraid that i'll oversleep tmr..
the vision of me waking up when the sun is like shining brightly keeps popping up in my mind
hahaha
hope everything goes well~~
*crosses fingers*

Rae
26+
scorpio


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